Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.

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(512): View more from Texas

Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?

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(316): View more from Kansas

Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?

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(651): View more from Minnesota

So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won

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(303): View more from Colorado

just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.

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(702): View more from Nevada

I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.

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(641): View more from Iowa

My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.

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