I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
