I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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