can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize