Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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