these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
