He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
