If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize