if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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