How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Randomize
