I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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