my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
