she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
