Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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