He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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