so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
