I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
