Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Dicks are not precious.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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