I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
