i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
