No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
