I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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