i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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