I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
They took my balls.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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