ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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