My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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