Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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