I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize