after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
