I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
she smelled like a LAN party
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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