I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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