Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
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Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
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Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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