4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize