ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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