apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
