So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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