we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Hippo gnu deer
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
