come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
