U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there