This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
