oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
