I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
