I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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