Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
