Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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