what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
