PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize