There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize