Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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