Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
